Resistentialism (Noun)

Pronunciation: [re-zis-'ten-chê-li-zêm]

Definition 1: The mock philosophy by P. Jennings as depicted in The Spectator (1948) claiming that inanimate objects are hostile to humans.

Etymology: The word is an artificial concoction of Latin res "thing" + resist laid over "existentialism." Jennings may have gotten his idea from the Russian novel by Yuri Olesha "Envy," whose main character, Nikolai Kavalerov, can't seem to avoid colliding with inanimate objects and is convinced they are conspiring to block his road to success.

Which, when it comes right down to it, is a pretty cool philosophy. And if you have to have a philosophy (and in my experience most people do), why not one which recognizes one of the great truths in life - that, usually when you least expect, inanimate objects have a nasty habit of jumping out of nowhere to metaphorically (or literally) bite you in the ass.

Incidentally, if you really want to find a copy of The Spectator, I suggest visiting your local British library's periodical section. If you are interested in getting a copy of Yuri Olesha's "Envy," I highly recommend visiting Alibris which, incidentally, is also my favorite online shop for obscure, out of print books.